Change is the law of life. And those who look only to the past or present are certain to miss the future.
John F Kennedy
I have had a hard time in the past, watching things leave my house - watching my ex take his bits and pieces of our life together and move it out. It is difficult knowing that he is moving it into another woman's house. It is hard coming to terms with the fact that he picked up and moved his life, into another woman's life without missing a beat....
However, it was not hard today as I watched him move some of the bigger items like his electronics out of the house. Today it was just another step in moving forward and it no longer hurt. At first I took it personally. I felt as though I was replaceable. I personalized it but as I have grown, learned and become stronger, I have realized that he will never be able to replace me. This is not about new and old, my stuff and his stuff - it is about moving on and growing apart, some of us growing up, others not so much.
What was hard today was to watch my ex's old partner who was helping him move. We got along great, super nice guy. He was so obviously uncomfortable, being in my home with my ex, moving stuff out. I asked about his daughter and wife and he enthusiastically answered but he was still uncomfortable near me. I get that often - people do not know what to say. Friends and acquaintances cannot wrap their heads around what my ex did, how he could do what he did and how it played out. They wonder, what do you say?
It made me sad... this is a man that we had over to our house when we were a couple. I met his family, we were excited and celebrated the birth of his daughter, I trusted him with the life of the man I loved and now, he is a stranger. Amazing how stupid actions have a ripple effect.
I guess it is all part of the process. Saying goodbye to the old, even if it is to people who had a positive impact on your life. It is not about replacing though, it is about growing. Everything is new but I wish the old would stop popping in because I don't ever want to go back, it hurts. Going forward makes me happy.
If nothing ever changed, there'd be no butterflies. ~Author Unknown
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